Tuesday, 1 December 2020

LIFE LATELY // Where We Are

 A Check in is so long over due.

Here we are, on the brink of entering the Winter season. There was frost on the ground today and it really made me recognise the change.

I have so much mental energy for progressing the blog, I spend hours thinking about it whilst driving about or pottering in those moments of quiet, but then when the time actually comes round to doing something with it I have started to bury my head in the sand. The thing is I love it but have got out of the habit and I really am wanting reform. I have to start somewhere and hopeful this post will help me start rolling with it again.

I always think everybody is so busy living their own life, what makes me think that anyone would want to read about mine? Then I find myself looking back at old posts and I know I want to keep filling up these pages to look back onto in the future. 

Experiencing Lock down 2.0 right now has let me get involved in sorting the entire house. Back in February we started taking the plaster off the walls in the spare room. Only now are we finishing that project. I am not bothered because we ended up having the year that we had but it is nice to have movement to a project that was started so long ago for us. With the house getting a total revamp I am excited to show you this year's work in the not so distant future. 

Life is constantly changing with the kids too. I find new battles coming up mostly surrounding gaming in Raph's case and the fact that we have a 17 year old girl in Etta's. They are great and changing, this year I feel like we have truly left that baby stage behind. A picture of  a 3 year old nephew in a hoody of Raph's confirmed it, at 9, that boy has grown up! I always say that life moves in stages, we are in a new one and it's fine, not negative, just new.

Rob keeps on working in trade, his skills are ever developing, is there anything this man can't do? Still looking like he did when we got married I question if he will ever look old or if he will have a Peter Pan like look to him, forever young! 

I am not working in any employed manner. My job with Charlotte Jacklin ended in Lock down which was a shame but also, 100% the way it was meant to be for both of us. I wanted to offer more to the kids, Charlotte started coaching in an area that she is so educated in. It has worked out for both of us for the moment. Now though, I am just home, sorting life and slowly trying to bring this blog back. Part of my avoidance was that I wasn't sure if this was for me anymore, but I really love it; let's just see if I can make anything of it again!

I have started looking at further education. I know, these thoughts would have never entered my mind at the beginning of the year, but I have changed. I want to help people so I am looking at how I can learn skills to support. Mainly through spoken word, writing on a public platform, things to help with everyday, I have no idea for careers but I feel I want to expand my knowledge in certain areas of mental care so am looking into that.

Our life is so different to what it used to be. Right now even quieter with no after school clubs or days out. I don't mind though, everyday I wake up and the sky is there and bright, ready for me to just embrace what life will offer me. I have got into a habit of practising gratitude more and every morning the same, "Thank you for this new day" chimes through my mind. I haven't had a bad start in a while because of it and it gets me out the bed and ready to go. 

With Christmas really no distance away, I am so close to putting all the decorations up but have a husband and children who categorically protest. That's what I get for nailing down how important advent is and everything starting on December 1st; backfired this year hasn't it! I just wanted to watch a Christmas film and pull out all the shelf sitter decorations, but I have the 'Not Till December' police on my back.

I thought I would share some pictures from a nice day I took out with the kids in the half term holidays. We popped out to do an outdoor pumpkin trail around the cathedral quarter and it just was a bit of an affirming day. I have done a good job up until now, the kids just seemed great and grown up and it just all felt natural. Until this year I would safely say that I was completely not maternal. Often very realistic in my view of not being a good parent and often getting it wrong but actually, having been handed lock down and stepping up to take responsibility for the role I had chosen in this life, it turned out to be the greatest lesson I could have ever had. I am a good mother, I keep a good house and encourage a good life. I try all the time to do it all right and fail but all failures allow me to stand up and grow more. I just keep trying to focus on the days and make sure I don't let them slip by. There are so many moments to be had!


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